joke

Joke

Hi everybody
I wanted to write jokes here..If there is another place plz say.
and I want you to help me and put your funny jokes here.
Thank you





The child comes home from his first day at school. Mother asks, "What did you learn today?"

The kid replies, "Not enough. I have to go back tomorrow


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Physics Teacher: "Isaac Newton was sitting under a tree when an apple fell on his head and he discovered gravity. Isn't that wonderful?"

Student: "Yes sir, if he had been sitting in class looking at books like us, he wouldn't have discovered anything."

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Little Johnny's new baby brother was screaming up a storm. He asked his mom, "Where'd we get him?"

His mother replied, "He came from heaven, Johnny."

Johnny says, "WOW! I can see why they threw him out!


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Teacher: Why are you late, Joseph?

Joseph: Because of a sign down the road.

Teacher: What does a sign have to do with your being late?

Joseph: The sign said, "School Ahead, Go Slow!"


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Doctor: You're in good health. You'll live to be 80.
Patient: But, doctor, I am 80 right now.
Doctor: See, what did I tell you

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A Chinese Call center [FONT=&quot]
[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Caller: Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan?[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Operator: Yes, you can speak to me.. [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Caller: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan! [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Operator: Yes I understand you want to speak to anyone. You can speak to me. Who is this? [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Caller: I'm Sam Wan .. And I need to talk to Annie Wan! It's urgent. [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Operator: I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone ! But what's this urgent matter [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]about? [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Caller: Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother Noe Wan was involved in an accident. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Noe Wan got injured and now Noe Wan is being sent to the hospital. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Right now, Avery Wan is on his way to the hospital. [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Operator: Look, if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this! [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Caller: You are so rude! Who are you? [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Operator: I'm Saw Ree .. [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Caller: Yes! You should be sorry . Now give me your name!! [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]Operator: That's what I said. I'm Saw Ree .. [/FONT]
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[FONT=&quot]Caller: Oh .....God
[/FONT]

 

Wife & husband

Wife:
I wrote your name on sand it got washed,
I wrote your name in air, it was blown away,
Then I wrote your name on my heart,
And I got Heart Attack.


Husband:
God saw me hungry, he created pizza,
He saw me thirsty, he created Pepsi,
He saw me in dark, he created light,
He saw me without problems, he created YOU.



Wife:
Twinkle twinkle little star,
You should know what you are,
And once you know what you are,
Mental hospital is not so far.


Husband:
The rain makes all things beautiful,
The grass and flowers too,
If rain makes all things beautiful,
Why doesn't it rain on you?



Wife:
Roses are red; Violets are blue,
Monkeys like u should be kept in zoo,
Don't feel so angry you will find me there too,
Not in cage but laughing at you

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